The internet has become part of everyday life.
We use digital platforms to communicate, maintain relationships, access information, manage services and stay connected with people around us. For older adults in particular, gaining confidence online can open up important opportunities for communication and participation. But the digital environment also creates risks. When online relationships become the starting point for manipulation, knowing how to recognise suspicious activity can make an important difference. Love scams often develop through digital communication, which means psychological awareness alone is not enough. People also need a basic understanding of the online behaviours and techniques that can signal potential danger.
A love scam can begin with something that appears completely ordinary: a message, a profile, a conversation or a new online connection. The digital tools themselves are not necessarily the problem. Social networks, messaging services and other online platforms are legitimate parts of modern communication. The risk comes when someone deliberately uses these tools to deceive another person. Many love scams take place online, making digital awareness an important part of prevention. Understanding how suspicious messages work, recognising phishing attempts and noticing unusual online behaviour can help people pause before responding to a potentially dangerous situation. This is particularly important because scammers do not necessarily begin by asking for money. The manipulation may develop gradually. First comes communication. Then trust. Then emotional attachment. Only later might a suspicious request appear. By that point, the person may already feel deeply connected to the individual on the other side of the screen.
The word cybersecurity can sound intimidating. For someone who is not familiar with technical terminology, it may create the impression that online safety is something reserved for IT professionals. But many important cybersecurity behaviours are surprisingly simple. They involve learning how to stop, question and check.
For example:
- Does this message make sense?
- Do I recognise the sender?
- Why am I being asked to click this link?
- Why is someone asking for information?
- Does this online profile seem consistent?
- Is someone putting pressure on me to act immediately?
- Is there something unusual about this interaction?
These questions do not require advanced technical knowledge. They require awareness.
Phishing is one of the fundamental concepts addressed in cybersecurity education. At its simplest, phishing involves deceptive communication designed to encourage someone to provide information, click on something, or take an action that benefits the person behind the deception. Phishing can appear in different forms and through different communication channels. A message may appear to come from a legitimate organisation. It may create a sense of urgency. It may ask the recipient to click a link or provide information. For seniors who are still building confidence online, recognising these techniques can sometimes be difficult.
This is where adult educators can help. Rather than simply telling learners “Don’t click suspicious links,” educators can encourage them to develop a habit of questioning unexpected requests. The key behaviour is to pause. Don’t react immediately. Read the message carefully. Consider who sent it. Think about what is being requested. If something feels unusual, ask someone trusted before taking action. The same principle can be useful in love scam situations.
Another aspect of cybersecurity awareness involves understanding that different online environments can present different levels and types of risk. This does not mean that a particular platform is automatically unsafe. Rather, users should understand that every digital environment has its own characteristics, communication methods and potential vulnerabilities. Adult educators can use this topic to encourage learners to think critically about where and how they communicate online. Questions can include:
- What information does this platform allow people to share?
- How easily can someone create a profile?
- What personal information is visible?
- Can strangers contact users directly?
- What tools are available for reporting suspicious behaviour?
- Does the platform provide ways to block unwanted contacts?
One of the most useful cybersecurity skills is recognising that something is unusual before the situation becomes serious. This is particularly relevant to love scams. A suspicious interaction may not initially look like a traditional “cybersecurity incident.” It may simply feel uncomfortable.
A new online contact might move the conversation very quickly. They might try to create a strong emotional connection in a short period. They might discourage the person from discussing the relationship with others or introduce increasingly unusual requests. The important point is not to focus on one isolated sign. Instead, people should learn to notice when several elements begin to form a pattern. Adult educators can encourage learners to trust the value of taking a step back. A pause can create space for reflection.
And reflection can make it easier to notice something that was difficult to see while emotionally involved.
Consider a simple routine:
Stop
Don’t respond immediately to a surprising or urgent message.
Check
Look carefully at what is being requested and who appears to be making the request.
Question
Ask yourself whether the situation makes sense.
Discuss
If you are uncertain, speak with someone you trust.
Decide
Only then determine what action to take.
This kind of approach can be applied to many online situations. It can also be particularly valuable when emotions are involved. A person who has developed a strong emotional connection may feel pressure to respond quickly. A safety habit creates a moment of distance. That moment can be enough to reconsider.
The earlier a person notices that something may be wrong, the more opportunities there may be to pause and reconsider what is happening. This does not mean that every unusual message represents a scam. It means that uncertainty should not automatically be ignored. A small question today may prevent a much more difficult situation later. This is particularly relevant to seniors who may be unfamiliar with certain online behaviours. Learning to recognise suspicious activity is therefore not about memorising an endless list of threats.
Pause. Question. Check. Ask for help when needed.